Tuesday, October 20, 2009

once upon a time

I'm laying on the floor with my sister.  We're on our bellies, pencil crayons in our hands... colouring the pages of my Beauty and the Beast colouring book.  She's watching Matlock.  I hate this show, but I don't care because I'm spending time with my sister. I'm watching her colour the page, envious of her ability to stay inside the lines.  I try to copy her artistic approach.  

It's a Monday night.  My parents are at a meeting; so, my sister is watching me.  After we colour, she does my hair, paints my nails and puts makeup on me.  It's not actually makeup.  She has one of my storybooks on her lap and she uses her makeup brushes to "dip" into the colours displayed on the cover and then pretends to splash the paint onto my face.  I love the way the soft bristles dance against my face and I laugh as she tickles me with the brush.

My parents come home.  I'm anxious at this point because they promised to bring me home a surprise.  They always brought me home a surprise.  It's a surprise, but at the same time I know exactly what it is.  They burst through the door and I run up and hug them.  They hand me a brown paper bag.  I open it up and smile.  Cream Soda and Sour Cream and Onion chips.  The usual.  I love it.  It was such a treat.

***

I had an unbelievably rough day.  Murphy's law was definitely slapping me in the face today with the "everything that can go wrong, will" theory.  After class, I stopped by the store on the way home and bought Cream Soda and SC&O chips.  I don't think I've tasted either since before I was ten years old.  Nostalgia is bouncing against my lips.  All my favourite memories are coming back to me now, swamping out the bad day I just had.  

I think we all get overwhelmed every once in awhile, and sometimes not even venting to people will help.  No matter what, they never say exactly what you want them to say.  I think that we can only strive for relief within our selves. We can achieve this by resorting back to a moment in our lives when we were happiest... and reliving those memories, grasping onto those once-felt feelings.  If you grasp hard enough, you can pull them out into your current situation.  And eventually, those feelings you've grasped from your memories will dilute the stress that's trying so hard to weigh you down.

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